Cashing out

01 Nov 2012

I read this week that Brits are hurtling inexorably towards a cashless society. And not just because the country will be flat broke in a year or two.
According to research from Skrill, "a leading provider of online payment solutions" (what are the odds?!), one in three UK citizens now carries on their person less than a fiempty-pocketsver in hard currency. What's more, 21 per cent believe physical monies will be a thing of the past within 20 years and about five per cent never carry any dough whatsoever.
The "research" from Skrill (who Dave Jr tells me is also a market leader in the field of sick dubstep choonz) indicates that Sweden is blazing the trail, with 97 per cent of payments made virtually.
This rings true with me, as I can vouch for the fact that at least one in three of my sales goons never has more than a fiver on them. Especially when it's pub o'clock on a Friday.

Suffolkating
As a business exec with a history of imagineering outside the box in the world of holistic branding strategies, I was nonplussed to read that the lovely county of Suffolk isBusinessman thinking and watching the question mark shaped cloud set for a big rebranding exercise. For some reason, tourism chiefs are proposing to brand it "the curious county". Right you are.
Curiously, local politicos have got into a right tizz about this, with one MP claiming curious is a synonym for "not quite right", and one labelling the move "idiotic and meaningless, if not positively dangerous" (alright, steady on).
"It has to be stopped," screamed another highly emotional MP. "Won't somebody please think of the children?!"
I doubt they'll be happy to hear that marketers also plan to boost the brand
with some awesome hashtags such as #proudtobecurious and #curiouscoast (isn't that one an Iris Murdoch novella?)
It gets worse. Plans are afoot to forge deep synergies with the vibrant arts and music scene "like local pop star Ed Sheeran". Perhaps they meant to put "the nauseous county"?

Financial irregularities
The Making the numbers add up - how better financial accounting can support and promote growth survey by the Commercial Division of Advanced Business Solutions in partnership with SourceforConsulting has clearly already taken up about 60 per cent of my word count this week. A good job too, as there's very little of interest to say about it.
Did you know that 23 per cent of finance pros are not confident in the accuracy of their fixed assets data? (More importantly, did you care?)
Simon Fowler, managing director of Advanced Commercial Business Something Something, wailed: "With the widespread use of error-prone spreadsheets, it is time for organisations to challenge their financial systems and processes."
Fair enough, Simon, but as a business owner I prefer it when outside meddlers don't challenge my financial systems and processes. Especially if they happen to be wearing a badge marked "HMRC".

Dunkin' disorderly
I was beyond horrified to learn this week that I fit into no fewer than four of the most at-risk groups of coffee overload, according to the unimpeachable research bods at no less an authority than Dunkin' Donuts.
coffee-cupIn honour of the recent US National Coffee Day (no, I don't know either) the sugary-treat maker compiled a list of the 10 most coffee-swilling professions in America, with salespeople, media workers, IT professionals and the disconcertingly vague "business executives" all featuring on the list.
Also making the cut were scientists, nurses, PR bods, engineers, teachers and, at number one, food preparation and service workers.
According to John Costello at the doughnut firm: "On National Coffee Day we celebrate the important and unique role coffee plays as a vital part of our daily lives."
Maybe you do, Johnny Boy. Unfortunately, I fear the rest of us are too busy getting on with jobs marginally more believable than "chief global marketing and innovation officer at Dunkin' Brands".

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