PC SQUEALER - CHANNEL TALK

DRUG DEALERS VS PC DEALERS

If the economic state of the channel has got you channel guys in the doldrums, have you ever wondered where else you could put to work your technical or marketing know-how? Well, as ever, PC Squealer is delighted to offer a suggestion - the lucrative world of international drugs trafficking.

DRUG DEALERS:

1. Refer to their clients as users
2. Have a first one's free offer
3. Have important South-East Asian connections (to help move the stuff)
4. Use strange jargon:
Stick
Rock
Wrap
E
Stash
Drive by
Hit (LSD)
Source
The Pigs
5. Realise there's cash in the 14-to-25-year-old market
6. Find their users really like their stuff when it works, but want to kill them when it doesn't
7. Have their job assisted by the industry producing newer, more potent product
8. Are often seen in the company of pimps, hustlers and low-lives
9. Find that when things go wrong, a fix is just a phone call away, but may be expensive
10. Are a lot of successful people getting rich in the industry while still teenagers
11. Sell products which cause unhealthy addictions - cocaine, heroin, weed. 'Nuff spliffed
12. Find that if they do their job well they get to sleep with sexy movie stars who depend on them

PC DEALERS:
1. Refer to their clients as users
2. Download a free trial
3. Have important South-East Asian connections (to help debug the code)
4. Use strange jargon:
SCSI
RTFM
Packet
C
Cache
CTRL ALT DE
Hit (WWW)
Sourcecode
Microsoft
5. Realise there's cash in the 14-to-25-year-old market
6. Find their users really like their stuff when it works, but want to kill them when it doesn't
7. Have their job assisted by the industry producing newer, more potent products
8. Are often seen in the company of marketing people, venture capitalists and fund managers
9. Find that when things go wrong, a fix is just a phone call away, but may be expensive
10. Are a lot of successful people getting rich in the industry while still teenagers
11. Sell products which unhealthy addictions - Doom, Quake, SimCity, Seven Kingdoms. 'Nuff said
12. Damn! Damn! DAMN!!!