JAMES HARDING VIEW FROM THE VALLEY
A major problem for Silicon Valley techies is the heinous problem of slow internet access at home. Dedicated phone lines are not enough.
Top executives have T1-lines installed in their homes, ski lodges and yacht moorings - the list is endless.This is to make sure they get the best connections possible, while the rest of us have to put up with 34.4Kbps modems at best. Most people also find that the quality of cable TV is pitifully poor. Despite the fact there are 57 channels on offer there is not enough football. Satellite dishes may offer hundreds of channels, but they are expensive. Couple those problems together, and kitting out the front room becomes an expensive nightmare.
But the answer to many families' problems could be found in the local electronics stores. A company called Hughes Network Systems has had a great idea to solve that problem which could easily transfer to the UK.
It is selling Direct Duo, a small satellite dish that can deliver 400Kbps internet service and more than 200 TV channels to the front room - and all for under #400. I want one - now.
Play that funky music
On the subject of freebies, Peter Buick of ADO Distribution has written to ask if I got a Sony Minidisk for free. He thinks I have been unfair to CDs in my previous columns and must be a minidisk owner who got one as a gift. Sadly not. He did put me straight about one thing though - it seems you can scratch with CDs because Denon manufactures scratchable compact discs. With jog wheels, apparently, it is possible to 'spin some sly sounds' with CDs. Personally, I cannot see dance DJs moving from vinyl to CD for a very long time.
Did you hear the one about ...
Buick also asked what Microsoft CEO Bill Gates' joke at Comdex was - the joke I decided not to include. Gates said something about how his Windows CE-based, internet-linked palmtop could access information from the Department of Justice. Yes, ha ha. That's why I left it out. But Buick did give me plenty of jokes instead and some of them can even be published.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid Explorer 4. Why did Gates cross the road? To stuff the chicken with Explorer anyway. Why did the DoJ cross the road? To ask the dead chicken if it had minded, because it refused to comment.
Tell you what I want ...
Which musical group would you expect to be the most up-to-date with technology and the internet? Some modern band like Prodigy or the Spice Girls? Not exactly. Only one band I know polled its fans in Silicon Valley to find out which songs they wanted to hear at the concert. Naturally, everyone in Silicon Valley is online and wanted to vote so it was a great success. So who is this ultra-modern band of musical innovators? Mick and Keef of the Rolling Stones, of course.
From the Big Smog ...
The people in Silicon Valley don't know they are born. The area code for San Francisco and the Valley is 415 but the phone authorities are running out of numbers. The code for the Valley is changing to 650, which has outraged companies in the area. They complain that not only will their stationary need changing, but so will all their software and computer-controlled dialling systems. Poor dears.
to the Big Smoke
They should try living in London and putting up with 01 changing to 071 and then to 0171.
But the amazing thing is that even after Silicon Valley's extensive changes, experts predict the area will run out of numbers again because of the rapidly expanding development of the area and its communications. They say the US should be forced to dial the area code even when making local calls, freeing up more numbers for them to juggle with. It certainly gives BT something to think about.
Throwing down the gauntlet
Silicon Valley highways are a battlefield and I don't just mean on the tarmac. The advertising boards at the side of the road have staged raging battles. A year ago, Wired put up billboards reading: '?', which in HTML means 'Is this the end of Netscape?' This prompted an outcry from the browser company. Then Informix produced ads claiming that its database software was faster than Oracle's and put them up outside Oracle's headquarters. Now the battle has switched to TV and magazines.
Vanity fair
Sun has TV ads promoting Java in everything from watches to cars. Gates and Sun CEO Scott McNealy are taking it in turns to appear on the front of every magazine, from Time to Vanity Fair. It seems that all the top execs are becoming extremely concerned with image. The latest gossip is that Apple interim chief Steve Jobs is so impressed with the looks of his mate Oracle CEO Larry Ellison, he has gone to the same expert to perform miracles on him. I hope you don't think I'm suggesting Ellison has been surgically enhanced. Certainly not. I only mean that he has hired image consultants to make him look good. Apparently Jobs walked into the consultant's office and said he wanted to be a cross between Ellison and Steven Spielberg. Now I know that Ellison is a bit of a playboy but that idea is surely stretching things a bit too far, no pun intended.
James Harding is US Editor of VNU Newswire, based in San Francisco.
He can be reached at [email protected] or on 00 1 415 306 0879.