Lickers in a twist

Nowadays we're lucky if vendors treat us to a lukewarm cup of coffee at a motorway service station.

But I was reminiscing with a friend about the good old days of partner trips to the US. He reminded me of the time he was chucked out of a club at silly o'clock in the morning for trying to lick tequila off one of the bar's employees.

I maintain it wasn't really his fault; we'd been forced to drink a mind-boggling quantity of the spirit by that nasty vendor. And if a few errant drops ended up on an unfortunate barmaid, then I'm quite sure he was only trying to do the gentlemanly thing.

Whatever happened, my pal had very little recollection of going to bed, and woke up the next morning with a hideous great tattoo on his arm. And I wasn't going to be the one to tell him it was only a temporary job.