Off the Germans
There - I did it. I did it so all you poor, deluded souls don't have to. I wrote off the Germans. When the inevitable happens, when the Three Lions (and can we please stop calling them that?) crash out, when you get your quadrennial dose of the words "penalty heartbreak", you can lay the blame squarely at my feet. I'm big enough and ugly enough to take it.
In football, as in business, I prefer to fly in the face of received wisdom. So - off the Germans. I'm going to categorically state now that we will not come off worse in the lottery that is an even-handed test of temperament, preparation and skill. Nor will we lose heroically to the odd goal in five after being reduced to ten men. We'll win 6-2. Bosh.
Did you all let your staff watch the game yesterday? I sincerely hope so. Team Dodgi headed off to a fancy West End bar as an exercise in team building. And tying one on. Did we lose any custom? I couldn't give a monkey's. Any customer giving the faintest consideration to overhauling their network infrastructure or updating their firewall estate while the World Cup is on is in receipt of my richly deserved contempt.
Here's hoping you all enjoy the match on Sunday as much as I intend to. It's certainly a mouth-watering contest between two giants of the world game. Steeped in history and burdened by the weight of expectation, you could be forgiven for going so far as to call it a clash of the titans. But who will triumph? Will Ashley Cole or Philipp Lahm be crowned the winner in the battle to be considered the world's most buccaneering left back?
Oh, and either England or Germany will gain the dubious honour of being embarrassed by Argentina in the quarter finals. Have a good one and do show a little leniency to any staff who appear a little green about the gills on Monday. Come on Ing-er-lund! Off the Germans.