Talking teddies

A press release I was sent got me all excited, until I read the whole thing

I'm not sure why I was sent a press release about a talking teddy bear, but there you go.

Having seen the film Ted for the first time this year (and loved it - perhaps because it not only featured a talking bear, but the original Flash Gordon as well), it certainly captured my interest.

Named 'Supertoy', this furry creature is described as a teddy bear with a mind of its own and the ability to hold 'real conversations' with those who speak to it.

Really?

A real conversation with a teddy bear? Is that just not a little creepy?

According to the press release, the robotic tedy 'mimics awareness' and has his own 'autonomous thoughts'. His mouth also moves in synchronisation with what he says apparently.

What on earth could a teddy be thinking? Do we actually want to know what our teddies are thinking? Particularly when they are dragged around by the arm or an ear by their young owners most of the time. I can't imagine their thoughts are that nice.

Something like: "OW! That hurts! Not my ear! No, that doesn't come off! Put me down! Don't chew that! Noooo, not the scissors! I'm going to get you back for this! You are going to SUFFER kid!"

Reading further into the release it emerges that you will need a smartphone to really get the best out of the bear. It features a handy compartment to place said smarthphone, after you have downloaded a special talking teddy App. Probably priced at about a gazillion pounds.

How many teddy age children own a smartphone? Possibly more than I think, but surely not that many.

To make matters worse, the technology is described as a 'sort of Siri for children'.

Let's stop right there.

As an iPhone user the thought of having to deal with Siri again fills me with dread.

I don't speak with an American accent - so immediately I was on the wrong foot, and it just got progressively more rubbish, until I finally turned it off.

So if this toy takes off, we could see hoardes of UK children speaking with faux American accents just so they can have a conversation with their talking bear.

Welcome to the workforce of tomorrow!