I'm all for the use of bleeding-edge turnkey solutions to provide holistic business efficiencies and drive a better work/life balance going forward on an ongoing basis. But even I felt a little bilious to read that firms are reportedly conducting more job interviews via the medium of videoconferencing.
According to thoroughly unimpeachable data from recruitment company OfficeTeam, 41 per cent of HR leaders are using video technology in the hiring process more than they were three years ago. Conveniently skirting around the fact that utilising something more could entail going from using it "not at all" to "once in a blue moon", OfficeTeam claims these figures betoken "a radical shift in the hiring process". Right you are.
The recruitment outfit's UK boss Phil Sheridan claimed videoconferencing "is particularly useful for those who have a long journey to navigate".
Long journey, is it? Diddums. If my potential hires can't even be bothered to make it into the office for their job interview, I'm afraid they're not Dodgi material. In fact, I ask all candidates to go on a scavenger hunt around the east London area before (hopefully) locating me and my inquisition team at a top-secret location. Which I'd like to stress is rarely, if ever, the saloon bar at the Dog and Duck.
Troll with the punches
In more innocent times trolls were mythical bridge-dwelling Norse creatures and/or exuberantly haired toys. In modern parlance trolls are far less lovable, as one fearsome internet abuser recently found to his cost.
Hurling vitriolic and vituperative vernacular at total strangers is clearly one of the best things about the internet. But you have to be careful whose tree you shake, and I'd suggest a man who punches people's faces for a living should be low down anyone's list of targets.
Still, that didn't stop one twitterer from giving light-welterweight boxer Curtis Woodhouse weeks of foul-mouthed insults. The pugilist eventually tired of the jibes and offered £1,000 to anyone who could provide the name and address of his abuser.
He then set off on the hour-long drive to the chap's house with the intention of "coming over for a brew", pausing at regular intervals to provide tweet updates, finally posting a picture of the street sign at the top of his nemesis' road.
At which point Terry Troll tweeted the boxer to apologise and stress that it was all meant as "a bit of harmless fun" (I've always found carefree enjoyment in being called an "ugly, vile cretin", which was probably the most printable insult).
Many have labelled Woodhouse a folk hero, while others have condemned his threats of violence towards someone who is more than likely a confused and acne-ridden teenager.
I'm not taking sides. But I'd like to stress, for any internet insulters or complaining customers who might be reading this, that I once placed joint fourth in the Barking and Dagenham area under-16s karate tournament. You never lose it.
Regular reader(s) may have previously seen my thrilling write-ups of "research" from the good folk at IllicitEncounters.com. The site specialises in helping attached types find a bit of how's-your-father outside the marital home, so they recently asked members about the most popular lies they tell to excuse otherwise unexplained absences.
In a shocking turn of events, plausible and hard-to-falsify excuses - such as going to the gym, seeing friends or working late - proved more popular than needlessly absurd ones. Surprisingly, given that the vast majority of the UK population never goes fishing, gets arrested or visits their elderly relatives, the least popular porkies were telling your spouse you'd gone fishing, got arrested or visited elderly relatives. Website spokesgoon Mike Taylor inaccurately described fishing's low placing as "interesting".
"It offers privacy, can go on late into the night and often in places with no mobile phone coverage," he said, with a slightly creepy amount of certainty.
Still, I am in need of a new fib to tell Her Indoors for those times when I need a pint of mild and a go on the quiz machine. She's got increasingly suspicious about the frequency with which I get a professional moustache waxing.
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