Dog gets a piggyback in porkography shoot

Snoop thinks the games industry should check out the adverts in the networking computer press (right) if it thinks it's hit the limit of how sex can be used to sell a product.

Snoop can exclusively reveal that Pulp's Jarvis Cocker has come out of the closet. We can confirm he is a gamer. The lead singer was seen last week by Snoop's sources trying to buy a Sony Playstation from Electronics Boutique on London's Oxford Street. But the gangly front man's purchase was nearly scuppered by the store's over-enthusiastic burglar alarm which apparently went off three times before allowing him to leave. The star-studded world of computer retail was also blessed by ex-Sweeney star John Thaw who was recently seen hanging out at Micro Anvika, CRN's independent retailer of the year. Snoop can reveal that TV's Inspector Morse refuses to conform to the usual Mac-loving luvvie. It was an IBM compatible notebook for John.

Staff absenteeism in computer retail could be a thing of the past. Martin Briggs, financial director of Network and owner of MCB, has bought himself a Land Rover to pick up work-shy employees who would rather stay under the duvet than assemble PCs. "That's the last time the buggers use the weather as an excuse not to turn up," he said. "They know I'll come round and collect them."

The beauty of a finely balanced supplier/customer relationship was on display at CRN's Awards Night. Roderick Manhattan boss Roger Barratt became so tired and emotional after First Aid failed to win the coveted title of best to sell retail business product, he couldn't manage to pay for the drinks for his guests. In stepped Byte man Steve Rigby with his gold card who then temporarily funded the Roderick Manhattan party's bar bill.

Will Copeland, owner of Norwich independent One Step Beyond, showed a cavalier attitude to bureaucratic small print and became one of only two men at the whole event who opted not to bother with dressing in a dinner suit and black tie.

Will's outlet was nominated in the independent retailer of the year category but lost out to Tottenham Court Road's Micro Anvika. This sadly dashed some of his grand marketing plans. "It doesn't have quite the same ring does it - Runner up independent of the year,"he said before sportingly congratulating the victors on their award.