Good times, bad times

Who's had a stonker, and who a stinker, in the channel over the last couple of weeks?

Good times

African elephants

For many, the Internet of Things concept is the embodiment of technology gone too far and a symbol of how humans are surrendering their ability to interact with the real world.

But one application of IoT that would melt even the most hardened of hearts is its involvement in preventing elephant poaching.

Sarah Eccleston (who also serves as a Cisco UK director) recently returned from a reconnaissance trip to Zambia, where she investigated how African elephants could be hooked up to t'internet and monitored to catch ivory poachers. Her goal is to establish a consortium of companies that can work together to help save the endangered pachyderms.

Sounds like a wholly worthwhile tusk to us.

Lawrence Jones

UKFast's stationers will have to get CEO Lawrence Jones' business cards reprinted after the Manchester-based entrepreneur was made an MBE in the 2015 New Year's Honours list. Jones was handed the accolade for his services to the digital economy over the past 15 years.

Gustav Holst's I Vow to Thee My Country wouldn't have sounded out of place underscoring Jones' accompanying press blurb as he declared: "Britain is an amazing nation and I don't believe there's another like it on the planet". Lawrence Jones, we salute you.

S3

While Capita - or "Crapita", as Private Eye famously lampooned it - is not universally loved, VAR bosses eyeing an exit route are certainly among those who would see the outsourcing giant in a positive light.

Having splurged ￡271m on 13 acquisitions in 2013, Capita remained on the M&A trail last year, sneaking through a deal with Basingstoke-based storage VAR Solid State Solutions (S3) just before Christmas.

Although Capita refused to divulge the price, it's safe to say el vino did flow at S3's Christmas party.

Bad times

Apps-led leakage

It may sound like an unpleasant medical condition, but "apps-led revenue leakage" is in fact an affliction said to be blighting IT suppliers rather than the incontinent.

The term was coined by EMC VP of EMEA global alliances, Ross Fraser, to describe the lost revenues EMC partners are sustaining by working with third parties such as Amazon to build cloud applications for customers.

Internal apps teams at SIs or outsourcing firms should keep the money for themselves by building their own hybrid clouds, Fraser advised.

We're not convinced employing a phrase containing the word "leakage" will ever catch on outside the market for urine bags and incontinence clamps.

Ebuyer

Online reseller Ebuyer is no stranger to the Advertising Standards Authority's naughty step but it outdid even itself late last year by managing to vex the watchdog twice in quick succession.

The ASA's goat was first got over a next-day delivery offer Ebuyer ran in October which it ruled was "likely to mislead". It considered the headline offer of "free next-day delivery on all of your orders this month" was contradicted by the small print.

Adding insult to injury, Ebuyer didn't respond when the ASA approached it with its concerns, which the e-tailer later put down to a "communication error". Sounds like the corporate equivalent of a dog eating your homework.

Crown Commercial Service

Bashing Crown Commercial Service, the government's procurement arm, seems to be everyone's new favourite hobby. This time, CCS was under fire after SMBs complained the three-week lead time given to respond to its new ￡300m IT schools framework favoured larger bidders.

"We have been working nights and coming in fuzzy headed," grumbled one unnamed supplier who felt the framework was geared towards "big boys" with vast bid teams.

Reports that CCS may also be responsible for the weakening ruble, third-world poverty and the shooting of JR remained unconfirmed as CRN went to press.