'I was a woman trying to be a man in a man's world' - Jacqueline de Rojas on overcoming setbacks on her way to the top
Tech veteran opens up on how being authentic was the key to success early on in her career
Tech veteran Jacqueline de Rojas has opened up on the setbacks she faced working her way up the ladder in the technology industry.
Speaking at the Women in Technology Festival, which kicked off today, de Rojas said she realised early on in her career that she was subconsciously trying to behave as men did in the industry, rather than being herself.
"I spent my early career emulating what the men did," she said. "I even got to the point where I was wearing a tie to work because I was trying to fit in so badly.
"I became a scary boss lady, metaphorically eating razor blades for breakfast and being a terrifying alpha female.
"It did work for me to certain point; I was successful but I was not fulfilled. It took me 10 years to realise that I was always going to be an angry feminist banging my head against the glass ceiling - not because I was a woman in a man's world, but because I was a woman trying to be a man in a man's world."
De Rojas has helmed some of the biggest companies in the tech industry, with senior roles at the likes of CA Technologies, McAfee and Sage. She currently holds a number of non-exec roles and is president of techUK.
She went on to explain that her own "self-limiting belief" led her to think that only men could be successful in the technology industry.
"I lacked authenticity and the value system that now informs everything I do," she added.
This realisation gave her the power to think differently about her then-role in technology sales, she explained, and helped her build a team of people that weren't driven by a stereotypical survival-of-the-fittest, cut-throat sales culture.
By 1999 she was in-line for a promotion to UK boss of the company, up against a male candidate with a far less impressive sales record.
"He got the job and when I asked for feedback about why I didn't get it I was told ‘sorry Jacqueline, we simply don't put women on the leadership team'.
"I was devasted and incredulous. It was a new kind of low for me because I did have the belief that life was always fair."
De Rojas ended up leaving this company and taking on the role of managing director at another business.
She explained that for a period she suffered from imposter syndrome - believing she should not have been given the role because she's a woman and fearing that one day the company would realise they made an error appointing her.
But she countered these feelings by asking questions and "being interested, not interesting".
"I decided to change my modus operandi from knowing things, to not knowing things," she said.
"I focused on asking questions and it served me very well.
"My style was much more about finding out than pontification from on high. It was about diversity and inclusion versus being about always being the same."
De Rojas revealed that, in a twist of irony, the company that overlooked her for promotion approached her more than a decade later and asked to return in order to "troubleshoot the business".
You can watch de Rojas' full keynote and more at the virtual Women in Tech Festival.