Booty calls

They're smug, cliquey, condescending, impervious to reason and they've got something we all secretly want - it's clear enough that right-thinking people everywhere have ample reasons to hate iPhone owners.

But, as if all that wasn't enough, research from online dating site OkCupid reveals users of the Apple device enjoy more between-the-sheets action than those who favour BlackBerrys or Android devices.

By the time they're 30, the average female iPhoner has made whoopee with 12 gentleman callers, while blokes will have clocked up 10 partners. Apparently.

Male and female BlackBerry pickers average eight apiece, while Android enthusiasts have knocked boots with a paltry six partners.

Our Gordon is notoriously Luddite, and has spent months pouring scorn on what he considers an overpriced and overhyped fanboy fad. He's changed his tune pretty sharpish, mind. Something about the roaming capabilities. (I know, I know. Better double entendres, audible groans and thinly veiled threats to the usual address, please.