SMB tech suppliers
Could the government really be taking the feelings of smaller IT suppliers into account after years of just paying lip service? Hopefully so, after Westminster sent in a "mystery shopper" brigade to investigate its procurement process following complaints from firms over the reams of red tape surrounding a simple £10,000 deal.
According to the government, 79 per cent of the cases investigated this way resulted in a positive outcome. Funny, when anything government PR-related is mentioned, the room starts to spin.
Storage sales staff
Storage sales professionals have been likened to Premier League footballers. Not in the sense that they enjoy driving Porsche Cayennes and talking in tired clichés, but on the basis that they have a limited window in which to make stupid amounts of money.
According to Jonathan Lassman, who recently set up storage reseller Epaton, the market for emerging technologies such as flash is at a tipping point, and ambitious sales staff who join his fledgling business can rake in up to 30 per cent gross profits.
"Why not get out there and earn as much money as possible?" Lassman intoned, before observing that storage is a game of two halves and one in which mistakes at the top level will always be punished.
As a piece of poetry, the latest spoof song devised by global reseller Systemax to motivate its staff to sell more stuff perhaps isn't up there with Dylan Thomas or WB Yeats.
But despite the poor grasp of the basic rules of rhyming and scanning it exhibits, the firm's take on Meghan Trainor's All About That Bass - purportedly sent out by CEO Richard Leeds to encourage staff to hit their phone-time targets - does at least show guts, if not any real judgement or sense.
It's lucky Leeds has a steady, well-paid day job, is all we can say.
The post-Christmas stock check will see many people mulling the rights and wrongs of "re-gifting".
An unappreciated offering in the world of M&A may come at a cost containing several more zeroes, but that doesn't mean an acquired company is immune from becoming as unloved and unwanted as a horrid jumper.
O2 was founded as BT Cellnet, before being spun out of the UK telco in 2001, and then sold to Telefonica five years later. The Spanish telecoms titan is now in talks to sell the firm back to its former parent. Don't be surprised if your next phone bill comes with a free mobile network operator as a loyalty reward.
Women in tech
A number of recent surveys have suggested there is still a chasmic disparity when it comes to the gender split of the tech industry, and the comparative salaries of men and women.
Ed Miliband recently wrote on Facebook that "it should be a matter of national embarrassment that the UK has the lowest proportion of female engineering professionals anywhere in Europe". Last year only 14 per cent of engineering graduates were female, and currently just four per cent of professionally registered engineers are women, claimed the Labour chief.
In better news for equality, Barbie has released a book titled I Can Be a Computer Engineer.
"I'm only creating the design ideas," giggles the anatomically improbable blonde.
"I'll need Steven and Brian's help to turn it into a real game!"
Problem solved, we're sure you'll agree.
Mancunian software pirates
If you're a Manchester-based business that's been playing fast and loose with software licensing, the Business Software Alliance is coming for you.
The UK's anti-software-piracy body is contacting 11,000 businesses in the Manchester area to nudge those using counterfeit or unlicensed software - knowingly or unknowingly - to get their houses in order. This is in response to a spike in piracy cases in the city, particularly among design and architecture firms, the BSA told us.
So more a case of a "please-don't-plunder call" than a Wonderwall, eh (P45, please!)?
Watford-based Hills Components ceased trading last month and its current inventory will be auctioned off
Robots, predictive analytics and selling without a salesforce: Where the UK's leading MSPs think the market is heading
MSP bosses to share their thoughts on the future of the managed services market
Distributor on course to hit £20m revenue this year
In an interview with CRN, Wendy Mars says Cisco and its partners are no longer having to arm-twist customers on the need for digital transformation